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For all of you that saw The Fast and the Furious, good for you, you saw a great movie that has nothing to do with it’s stupidly titled sequel, 2 Fast 2 Furious. It seems that every letter of the alphabet included in a movie’s title costs distributors money, maybe there isn’t a premium on numbers, yet. Regardless of the kindergarten title, 2 Fast 2 Furious does excel in many areas that require you to put your brain aside and replace it with a squished orange to get the needed effect created by the chase sequences, shoot-outs, and general disregard for the English language. That response is you drooling over yourself in anticipation of which law of physics the cars will break next. Yet, none of this matters as it doesn’t detract from the fun you will have watching such a harmless movie.

Be warned anyone entering with the expectations of a Fight Club or The Matrix you will be very, very disappointed. Even patrons entered with the expectation 2 Fast is comparable to its predecessor will find themselves somewhat disappointed by the hack-job editing and so-so direction, but you don’t go see a movie like this for drama and award winning performances. You are here to see hot girls on hot cars and you get plenty of both.

2 Fast 2 Furious moves the racing scene from LA to sunny Miami where disgraced cop Brian O’Conner (Paul Walker) is a big man in the scene. Pulling in thousands of dollars a night by showing up other racers with his Skyline (and it is one hot car). When Brian is nabbed by his former employers (that crazy FBI guy from the first movie) he is given the cliché choice. Work for US Customs and the FBI to bring down drug runner Carter Verone (Cole Hauser) or go to jail for his actions in both LA and Miami. Obviously Brian chooses the latter or this would be 2 Fast 2 Jail and not much fun to watch as inmates race around the shower-room power sliding to avoid getting their clutched popped.

Coming along for the ride is model turned singer tuned actor Tyrese playing Roman Pierce, one of Brian’s old buddies from the ‘hood, apparently they have those in surfer towns, and Agent Monica Clemente (Eva Mendes) who may or may not have flipped in the presence of Verone. Also showing up is model turned actress (and I use that term very loosely) Devon Aoki who looks like her face was attacked by a hive of killer bees and swelled up to the size of a bag of potatoes. If you think she looks bad, wait till she talks. A paper bag and a muzzle might come in handy with this one. Through this loosely based chain of events that director John Singleton calls “plot” we find out that Verone needs two drivers to run drug money for him and, surprise, Roman and Brian get the call.

As a film being analyzed by the harshest critic it is absolutely horrible. A movie plagued with quick editing cuts, very bad direction, lack of a real staple character, and the list goes one. Yet, when you look at it from a person who obviously has had a few too many brain cells killed off you find that there is a certain charm to watching $100,000 dollar cars you will never be able to afford race around on screen and defy the laws of physics.

2 Fast, in all actuality, is no where near a bad film, but it is even farther from a good one. If you want to have a good time enjoying yourself and making fun of what is happening on screen this movie will do just that for you. Don’t expect a cerebral action spectacular, but do expect to be fulfilled on the promise of lollypop girls in shiny expensive cars and enough product placement and promotion to make a person sick to their stomach. Really, when was the last time you saw a Pepsi billboard, and what are the odds of a car crashing into it?

Without a brain 2 Fast 2 Furious excels past the finish line, but those with one should expect to loose a piece of it. You can also expect to have a good time viewing a film that doesn’t try to be anything more than it really is.